VH1 aired an episode on "Purity Balls" and it intriqued me to know what this is all really about. Did you know that these balls happen in 48 states and 17 countries would like to join in on this celebration. Purity balls, a night of celebrating abstinance. It is a religious event among conservative Christians for fathers and their daughters to celebrate their daughters abstinance and staying true to themselves and to God. These balls help form the bond between the father and daughter, as well as helping the girls form self-esteem and integrity by staying pure. It's said to be "a cinderella night" where girls dress up in gowns and their fathers wear tux's and they dance all night long. The daughter and two witnesses sign a pledge saying that she will remain abstinant until marriage. The father's present their daughters with a purity ring that they will exchange on their wedding day for a wedding ring. Which goes along with the sterotype of "daddy's little girl" and that it's the father's duty to protect their daughters. They bring white roses to a cross in the middle of the room to bow down to God. I understand that it's a hard issue to talk about sex with your children, but I don't think that fathers should be going as far as celebrating the fact that their daughters are remaining pure under marriage. It should be a private matter, and not be put out in the open. It's just a little awkward for me to think about going to a ball with my father. I mean some of these girls are too small to even think having sex, they're not even developed. I'm sorry but this is just a little over the top. What do you think, do you think this is a good message to pre-teens and teens that staying pure in a good thing? Looking at the rate of teenage pregnancies and teens being infected by STD's this is a good idea. Since peer pressure is hard for some people to resist, especially in high school. Though the message is good, I feel like it somewhat takes away from it being a personal choice of young girls.
My family is Roman Catholic, and while we don't have celebrations like this, I was raised to believe that sex outside of marriage is a sin. From the first time my parents talked to me about sex, I was told it was something for married couples only, and in the sixth or seventh grade I made the decision to remain celibate.
ReplyDeleteAt this point in my life, that decision has become more and more difficult. Guys our age don't just want sex, they expect it. I can't begin to tell you how many potential relationships I've ended just by sharing my decision to wait. It's a dealbreaker for a lot of people.
Personally, I don't see very much of an issue with the whole "Purity Ball" idea. These girls are growing up in a society that often sees abstinence as something shameful or embarrassing, that the only people who aren't having sex are the ones who "can't get any." I think as a culture we need to find a happy medium between enforcing abstinence-only and treating virginity like a disease. It may be a good thing that these girls can learn to celebrate their decision to wait before being thrown into a sex-obsessed society. They may change their minds later, but at least they'll have given the decision a lot of thought. Parents should be more involved in teaching their children that sex requires a great deal of responsibility. At least these girls are establishing relationships with their fathers.
Yeah i like the idea of the purity ball because like you said it is an example against peer pressure. Young people can see this group celebrating their celibacy. It can give the teans possible being pressured into having sex a better mindset that says hey just because i don't wanna have sex doesn't mean i;m wierd theres people celebrating that fact on TV. Showing these balls can give young people greater confidence in the face of peer pressure.
ReplyDeleteI don’t think this is a good idea because it is not in the best interest of the girls but in the fathers. When these girls become adults who will they give their up most respect too, their husbands and their dads. Where is the glory in being a MOM and having a daughter who is a successful LEADER instead of a WIFE? Anyone can be a wife and everyone is born a virgin. Virginity is something that was really given by man as being IDEAL but it's really just part of being a human. How an infant could not be born as a virgin its common sense. I think we should definitely celebrate being abstinent and trying to do the right thing by God. However these balls are not for God because he wants us to be happy. Being happy is based on having goals for yourself and accomplishing them within yourself not because your DAD wants it and not because it will benefit your husband and GOD (ANOTHER MAN FIGURE). So really it’s all about being beneficial to men not to the girls or their MOMS (ANOTHER LIFE GIVER).
ReplyDeleteI agree with you about privacy between child and parents. I would certainly feel out of place throwing a big party celebrating my virginity, it seems a little extreme to me to include all of the community. However, I think its a great idea to encourage girls to wait until their married to have sex. It teaches them how to respect themselves therefore others learn to respect them. On the other hand, it should not be a father's choice to determine whether or not his daughter will have sex or not. Little girls grow up and learn for themselves. I think it is more important to educate children on sex and responsibilities that sex entails- they are going to make their own decision anyway I think it is important they understand all aspects of their decisions.
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